


I Can't See Without My Glasses

by hopeless_eccentric



Category: The Penumbra Podcast
Genre: Canon Compliant, Canon Non-Binary Character, Fluff, Humor, Nonbinary Juno Steel, Other, he's blind as a bat y'all, juno has no plans to point this out to him, nearsighted nureyev was too easy to go for, peter loses his glasses, spoiler alert theyre on his head
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-07-11
Updated: 2020-07-11
Packaged: 2021-03-04 23:53:43
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,657
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25194976
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/hopeless_eccentric/pseuds/hopeless_eccentric
Summary: Peter Nureyev loses his glasses. They may or may not be on top of his head. If they are, Juno certainly isn't going to mention it.
Relationships: Peter Nureyev/Juno Steel
Comments: 30
Kudos: 272





	I Can't See Without My Glasses

**Author's Note:**

> Title from Scooby Doo because why the hell not? My google doc for this is literally titled "big velma energy." As a further note, I have 20/20 vision so uh. Hope this is accurate. I checked with a friend or two just to make sure but still. 
> 
> Enjoy!!

When Nureyev stormed into Juno’s quarters looking the closest to disheveled a person such as he could manage, Juno knew something was wrong. 

Barely sparing an acknowledging glance for Juno, who was half dressed and sputtering varied noises of protest at the intrusion, Nureyev ran a blind hand over any surface he could reach. His usually clever fingers grasped at hair products and discarded pieces of clothing that had yet to journey their way home to their respective drawers and closets. He grabbed at an eyeshadow pallet in triumph before holding it a bit closer, groaning, and setting it back down again. 

“Hey, Nureyev, I’m talking to you,” Juno finally called loud enough that Peter turned in his direction. The blurred mass he assumed was Juno Steel seemed to be halfway through putting on a pair of pants. “Maybe knock before walking in on a lady when he’s dressing.” 

“My apologies,” Nureyev said, eyes turning to the bedside table. “I’m in a bit of a hurry.” 

“We’re not leaving for the heist for another two hours.”

“Exactly,” Nureyev began, fingers trailing over the furniture as he squinted, as if trying to think the object of his search into existence. “We only have two hours before the heist, and this is of the utmost importance.” 

Juno sighed. “What did you lose?” 

“My glasses. I knew I should’ve picked up contacts on Venus when we stopped, but I didn’t think I’d be out for another—“ he broke off, brow furrowed. “Why are you laughing?”

”I’m not laughing,” Juno laughed. 

Had Nureyev seen more than a blur in place of his reflection above Juno’s dresser, he might have had a proper look at himself. He was half-dressed, scarf undone around his neck and jacket discarded somewhere in his own quarters. Atop his head lay a pair of wire-framed glasses, hidden amongst a mess hair yet to be meticulously tamed. 

“Is this funny to you?” 

“Kinda.”

Nureyev crossed his arms, stepping closer to Juno for a better look at him. “I hope you’re still enjoying yourself when we’re unable to complete the heist on account of my physical shortcomings,” he spat, though the snorts Juno was muffling into his sleeve were woefully contagious, and Nureyev’s wavering voice was intent on making that fact known. 

“Fine, I’ll—“ Juno broke off to wheeze. “I’ll help you look for them.” 

“You’d better.”

Juno wiped his eyes on the corner of his sleeve in an effort to look slightly more composed. It didn’t work. 

“Okay, so where do you last remember having them on?” He asked, forcing his gaze away from the top of Nureyev’s head now that he was close enough to be properly seen. 

“I remember having them on last night when I was with you, but I’m almost positive my vision was blurry when I walked back to my cabin,” he offered. “I will admit, I was not in the… clearest of head spaces.” 

Juno snorted. “Call it what you like. Maybe this would all be a bit easier if you’d stayed the night.” 

“I couldn’t manage to lose a second, Juno, and you and I both know the two of us are fond of the snooze button when left on our own together,” Nureyev chuckled. As rushed as his morning had been, however, he had to admit he wouldn’t mind waking up with Juno in his arms. 

“Are you still angry that we were less than five minutes early for the asteroid heist?” 

“Juno, darling, just because I can’t stay mad at you doesn’t mean I won’t try,” Nureyev smiled, soft and sweet and responsible for most of the butterflies in Juno’s stomach. He didn’t think Nureyev would ever stop having that effect on him, and he didn’t particularly mind. 

“Is there anything else you remember about last night?” 

“Many things,” Nureyev began, smile becoming more of a teasing grin. 

“Anything about your glasses?” 

Nureyev feigned a dejected sigh. 

“They fell off at some point, if I’m remembering correctly,” Nureyev thought aloud. “So, what does a detective such as yourself make of that?” 

Juno knew exactly what a detective such as himself made of that. The glasses slid backwards, and Nureyev, who had been half-asleep on his feet when he left the room, crashed without remembering to take them off. 

“Been awhile since I’ve been a detective,” Juno snorted. “How sure are you that I’ll be right?”

“I’ll sing your praises if you want, though I’m afraid I can be quite verbose and we are rather lacking in time,” Nureyev started, unable to keep his veneer of annoyance for long before a smile poked through. “However, I will say that you were certainly the detective in your day, at least. You did catch me, after all.” 

“I don’t know much about where you’re from, but on Mars it’s kind of a social faux pas to go through a lady’s back pocket while kissing him, Nureyev. Did you really think I wouldn’t notice?” Juno chuckled.

“You seemed rather caught up in the moment, and it was a risk I was willing to take,” Nureyev shrugged.

“You could have taken that key any time you wanted. You do know that, right?” Juno returned. 

Nureyev huffed. “I don’t tell you how to do your job.”

“Speaking of which, I think your best bet is to check behind the bed for your glasses. They might have tilted back and off your head at some point,” Juno said.

Nureyev took him by the arm as he made his way towards the bed. It would have been quite the romantic gesture if he hadn’t been using Juno as a spotter for the various clutter that tormented even Juno’s feet on the daily. 

“Quite the gentleman, Nureyev,” Juno snorted. “There’s a charger by your left foot.” 

“Nothing but the best for—“ Nureyev took a comically large step around a black smudge on the floor. “My lovely lady.” 

“I can check the bed for you,” Juno offered. 

Nureyev made a noise of protest, but quelled when Juno held up a hand and began to move around the pillows and sheets. When those yielded nothing, he bent to check below and behind the bed. 

“As much as I’m having difficulty appreciating it, I’m sure you look wonderful at that angle,” he mused. Juno made a noise that might have been a laugh, though it was hard to tell from under the bed. 

“If you wanted me out of my pants, you should’ve come here ten minutes earlier.” 

“They’re khakis, darling, I don’t want anybody in them.” 

Juno laughed. “Not my fault we’re playing ‘married-with-kids.’”

“I never said it was,” Nureyev started, taking a tentative step towards the bed and wincing as he stubbed his toe on something unseen. “How’s the search going?” 

Juno resurfaced and shook his head. “All I found were a couple socks I’ve been looking for.” 

Nureyev sighed and offered a hand to help Juno up. Juno took it, stumbling slightly and landing a few inches too close to Nureyev. 

“You look nice, now that I can see you,” he smiled. 

“Really now? I thought you hated these pants,” Juno teased.

“I can’t see them right now.”. 

“What can you see?” 

“Your face. Your makeup. Both are lovely, though I can’t help but notice you didn’t put lipstick on,” Nureyev mused. “Hoping for something?”

“Nah, I usually do my lipstick after I put on my pants,” Juno snorted. 

Nureyev rolled his eyes. “You know that’s not what I meant. You never take anything seriously, do you?” 

“You love it.” 

Nureyev’s grin ate half his face. 

“Guilty as charged, my dearest detective,” he murmured, though the words faded into a softer, wordless sound as their lips met, brief and chaste and the best damn thing that had happened to Juno all morning. He couldn’t believe mere minutes ago, he had regretted that Nureyev went back to his own quarters for the night. 

When they broke apart, Juno’s hand still on the small of his back and Nureyev’s still on Juno’s waist, a tiny tap, barely audible over the humming of the engine and oxygen system, shocked them both. 

Nureyev’s glasses fell back into place. 

He blinked, mouth agape, before his face contorted into a glare. Juno burst out with the laughter he had been managing to contain for the last several minutes now. 

“Juno Steel,” Nureyev began, low and dangerous and barely audible over Juno’s wheeze. “For your own sake, please tell me you didn’t know that my glasses were on my head.” 

“I can’t believe it took you seven hours to notice,” Juno wheezed. 

“You’re lucky you’re so pretty,” Nureyev groaned, fixing his glasses as he spoke. “Which I can now properly appreciate.” 

“You’re horrible at being mad at me.”

“One of my greatest downfalls, I assure you,” Nureyev finally managed to laugh, glasses going askew once more as he shook his head. 

“Mind if I?” Juno asked, raising a hand to push his glasses back into place. 

“As little as I trust your intentions, go ahead.” 

The glasses returned home with little detour. Juno grinned, crooked and beautiful and, at long last, clear. 

“Not so bad, am I?” 

Nureyev huffed. “I suppose not.” 

“How long do you want me to postpone my lipstick?” Juno teased, receiving a smoldering glare in response. 

“I might not be able to stay mad at you, but there’s a time and a place,” Nureyev said, making an admirable attempt at sounding unamused. 

“Fine. Will you reconsider if I told you I just now realized your shirt is on backwards?” 

“I’m not an idiot, Juno. I’m not falling for that.” 

Juno pressed the tip of his finger to where the tag poked out from Nureyev’s collar. Nureyev glanced downwards, then groaned. 

“Thank me once your pride’s healed,” Juno chuckled. 

Nureyev glared at him pointedly and pushed his glasses back into place with his middle finger while Juno broke down laughing once more.

**Author's Note:**

> Thank you so much for reading!! Make sure to smash that kudos button, leave a comment down below, and don't forget to stay awesome!!
> 
> Find me on tumblr at @hopeless-eccentric if you want to yell about glasses with me!


End file.
